Seven Words
Article – 4 Rules for Starting Over after Failure
I sometimes stumble.
I sometimes fall.
I sometimes fail.
So do you.
Each of these three things is different by degree. To stumble is not to fall. To fall is not to fail. To fail is not necessarily forever. The question is how to start over after we have stumbled, fell, and failed? How do we begin again?
A wise person learns from the history of others. The foolish have to learn everything by the pain of their own history. Real fools never learn. By looking at one story of Peter we can learn the four step process of starting over and turning failure into success.
Remember the story? Peter tragically denied that he knew Jesus. It happened between 1 and 5 on the cold night when Jesus was betrayed by Judas. As the soldiers led Jesus away, Peter followed at a distance. Friends of the enemies of Jesus thought they recognized Peter as one of the his followers. Three times they asked him and three times he denied it. Peter did not simply deny that he knew Jesus. He also denied that he had a relationship with Jesus.
If Peter’s story ended here, it would teach us nothing except that good men can fail. Fortunately there is a better ending to the story. Fifty-three days later Peter the Denier because Peter the Evangelist. He became a man who shows us how to start over and make it work. His journey demonstrates four steps to every restart in life.
Rule 1 – Take an honest look at yourself.
You can see this step in Mark 14:30, “Immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him: ‘Before the rooster crows twice you will disown me three times.’ And he broke down and wept.”
Peter wept because he saw himself for what he was – fearful and cowering. He took an honest look at himself and didn’t like what he saw. Before a lost man can find himself, he must realize that he is lost. Some men (and women) find this hard to do and so remain lost. If today you find yourself in the throes of failure, the first step to recovery is to admit that you are lost. Take an honest look at yourself.
Rule 2 – Engage your emotions.
Notice that our text says that after he remembered that he failed Jesus, “He broke down and wept.” (Mark 14:72).
Except for those people who cry about everything, tears are not a sign of weakness. Tears are a sign of passion. They show you care. If you have failed, engage you emotions and get started again. No, you do not have to cry, but you do have to care passionately about making things right.
Rule 3 – Forgive yourself.
There are two words in Mark 16:7 which amaze me. After Jesus rose from the dead an angel instructed those at the tomb to go back and tell his disciple that Jesus is alive. The phrase “his disciples” includes all of them, but the angel says to tell “his disciples and Peter.” If Peter is included in the phrase “his disciples” then it seems redundant to add the words, “and Peter.” I feel confident that the angel added those two words at the instruction of Jesus. Jesus knew that Peter had failed miserably and might need special mention to assure him that he could get past his failure. I can almost hear Peter asking, “Did he really say ‘and Peter?’”
If you have failed, forgive yourself. Everybody fails. Everybody! Until you forgive yourself you will be stuck in the past. You will be stuck in your failure.
Rule 4 – Start doing something different.
Peter had denied a relationship with Jesus, but then he ran to the tomb. A few days later he stood on the temple mount and preached the first Gospel sermon.
Until you start doing something positive and different, you have not started over. You can’t just cry and forgive yourself. You have to start doing something. The old phrase is not “Well said” but “Well done.”
Make a new plan. Get good counsel on this step. Proverbs 15:22 tells us, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Ask someone who has walked the same path before you.
Make a plan and stick to it. Do something different. This is part of the formula for starting over, for turning failure into something good. Do something different. If you always do what you’ve always done, you will always get what you have right now. How is that working out for you?
One final note…
If this process does not work, go back to step one and start over again. Repeat the process again and again and again until you get it right. Remember, “Failure is not the opposite of success. It is part of success.”
Lonnie Davis
Quote
“We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.”
~ Aristotle
Scripture – Colossians 3:23
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart,
as working for the Lord, not for human masters.”
Bible Quiz
- What is the first thing that God ever said was “Not good?”
- Who had an all night wrestling match with an angel and wound up crippled because of it?
- How many angels are given names in the Bible?
(For answers see bottom)
Resource: Bible.is
“Bible.is” is a Bible reading application for your smart phone. It contains many translations and is free. The great thing about the program is that you can look up a verse and then hit a button and listen to a professional recording of the Bible. You can get it for either the iPad, iPhone, or an Android phone. Google it and download it. It will be a blessing to you. You can drive down the road or lay in your bed and listen to a beautiful reading of the Bible for free!
Humor
My dog reacts to a vacuum the same way I do when my wife says, “We have to talk.”
Fact
Here is something most Christians do because the Pope started it. In 590AD, the world was in the throes of a plague that eventually killed more than 25 million people. One of the early signs of the plague was sneezing. Pope Gregory instructed Catholics to offer unceasing prayer for divine intervention. Part of his instruction was when anyone sneezed an immediate prayer should be said. That prayer was “God bless you.” (Taken from National Geographic).
Answers to QUIZ
- God said it was “not good” for man to be alone. (Genesis 2:18)
- Jacob, Abraham’s grandson wrestled all night with a man who certainly was an angel. In the end he because crippled because of this encounter. (Genesis 32:22-31)
- Only two angels are known by their names in the Bible: Gabriel and Michael. They found in numerous places in the Bible. There are other angels, but their names are not mentioned.